The astounding discoveries of Khan-li of Dimph-yoo-chur

“The Last American” is a short story penned in 1889 by John Ames Mitchell, co-founder of the magazine “Life”. It turns out to be a dystopian science fiction story about the decline and fall of the United States.

The plot (if that's the right word for it) is set in the year 2951, when a ship from Persia reaches the North American continent, finds it uninhabited and discovers the ruins of New York City. The Statue of Liberty is still standing, though. The Persians, who turn out to be Muslims with somewhat unusual customs (they cremate their dead and use Christian reckoning of time), mistake the remains of Astor House for a temple, and are attacked by a bear and an “odorous kitten”, presumably a skunk. Later, they set sail for Washington DC, where they find the three last remaining “Yahnkis” or “Mehrikans” living among the “temples”. The survivors are arrogant, violent and drink whiskey, but otherwise live on a Stone Age level. A little misunderstanding ends with a battle between Persians and Mehrikans, eventually killing all three of the latter.

The story is too short to contain a detailed scenario of the fall of the United States. We only learn a few bits and pieces: how the Americans lacked their own culture, how their avarice and great power politics led to a war with the European powers (which the Americans won), how conflicts between rich and poor tore the nation apart… The author is anti-feminist, and constantly complains about emancipated women. At some point, the United States established an authoritarian regime under “the Murphy dynasty” and the “Hy-Burnyan dictators”, which massacred the Protestants. In plain English: the Irish Catholics took over! (For Hy-Burnyan, read Hibernian.) However, the real downfall didn't come until 1990, when all of the North American continent was depopulated due to dramatic climate changes! Persia, by contrast, is de-industrialized, since nobody understands how to make machines work anymore. Instead, the machines are on display at the Historical Museum of Teheran.

I can't say “The Last American” moved me. Sure, the story is based on an intriguing concept, and probably looked like science fiction back in 1889. Today it sounds more realistic, but it's too short (about 30 pages) and too boring to really move the reader. Hence, only two stars.