You are It

 

So this evening I feel like linking to this (a previous blog post). 

The more things change, the more they stay the same

Apocalypse not

 

- Yeah, I´m an extinct Giant Swan from Malta,
so how does this Hormuz opening help me?

So apparently the Strait of Hormuz has been opened. For ten days. Because of something in Lebanon. Maybe. Don´t get me wrong, but does anyone even care anymore? 

Elephants have no rights

 

- Gotta problem with pachyderms, huh huh? 

Why animal rights and veganism doesn´t work. The brains of our ancestors (Homo erectus again) became big thanks to hunting and feasting on primordial elephants...

Without "speciesism", no Man. Deal with it.  

Human ancestors butchered elephants

Clear as crystal

 

A sequel to the previous blog post. Homo erectus collected crystals already 800,000 years ago. Other hominins have also valued these little trinkets. Here is a quote from the paper linked below: "Notably, none of those crystals was used as a tool, weapon or ornament. They were neither worked, modified or repurposed in any way, nor do they show signs of use as jewels. Yet, hominins valued these stones enough to transport them from the geological outcrops to the caves used as refuges. These findings suggest that, almost 800,000 years ago— possibly earlier if additional claims are confirmed—, H. erectus displayed attraction to quartz and calcite crystals, treasuring them for reasons beyond practical necessity." The authors point out that in Homo sapiens, this would surely have been interpreted as evidence for symbolic thought!

Unfortunetely, the bulk of the paper is less impressive. Why is it strange that a few chimpanzees from circuses who are used to seeing and handling objects of human interest find crystals sufficiently alluring to collect them? Clue: it isn´t, and the researchers even admit it themselves. They recommend studies on wild apes instead...

Ahem. So nothing has really been proven here.

On the origin of our fascination with crystals

Connected to the cosmos

 

This is sheer speculation, of course, but it´s still intriguing. Hindus actually worship ammonite fossils (shaligrama stones), so that´s certainly a thing. But did Homo erectus really have a symbolic culture? I mean, could they even speak? It would be absolutely fascinating if the erecti were "spiritual but not religious"! Apparently, even chimpanzees collect shiny stones with no obvious utilitarian purpose...

Homo erectus "connected with the cosmos"

The Piltdown Octopus

 

Let´s be honest about this. Had this fossil not been mentioned in the popular Guiness Book of World Records, absolutely nobody would have given a damn. Who cares if octopi evolved 150 million years later than previously thought? But sure, some pesky creationist might dub this "The Piltdown Octopus" and make it just as famous as the bombardier beetle!

From the article (see link below):    

>>>A fossil that was fundamental to describing the evolution of octopuses turns out to have been an impostor, all along.

>>>The famous 300-million-year-old Pohlsepia mazonensis, discovered in 2000 and later lauded in the Guiness Book of World Records as the oldest known octopus species, has been reclassified as a nautiloid – a shelled cephalopod closely related to the nautiluses living in the ocean today.

>>>This means that scientists are going to have to redraw the cephalopod family tree – the discovery pushes the record of nautiloid soft tissue back by around 220 million years, and brings the earliest evidence for octopuses forward by around 150 million years.

World´s oldest known "octopus" turns out to be an entirely different animal

Lovecraft´s Lucia

 

- You *do* know that we are evolutionary cousins, right?
- Nah, I´m a special creation. God loves beetles! 

Just watched a rather boring French docu about the evolution (or is it EVIL-ution) of insects. Apparently, Lucia (or LUCIA = Last Universal Common Insect Ancestor) was a crustacean which crawled out of the ocean...and the rest is history. Hundreds of millions of years of history, to be exact. 

No surprise there. I mean, the idea that fleas, locusts and termites (or the praying mantis!) are ultimately derived from a primordial cousin to crayfish and crabs does make a certain intuitive sense. They are equally eerie and unsettling. Like some stuff straight out of Lovecraft.

Although I have to say that arachnids are even worse. Where did *they* come from, I wonder? Color out of space?  

    

Tatzelwurm

 

Years ago, I actually read a book which took the Tatzelwurm seriously and proposed that it could be a cryptid, perhaps a large and largely unknown species of lizard. Think the Gila Monster, but much more agile. Reading more about it, I think it´s *much* more likely that we´re dealing either with local folklore (think dragons) and/or misidentified mammals. Why else would the "lizard" have the head of a cat? Of course, the book in question also took "de Loys´ ape" seriously, so there´s that...

Can you tell me about the Tatzelwurm?

The Tatzelwurm (also called Stollenwurm or Bergstutzen) is a creature from Alpine folklore, especially associated with parts of:

• Austria

• Switzerland

• Bavaria in Germany

Its name roughly means “claw worm” or “pawed worm” (from German Tatze = paw, Wurm = worm/serpent).

---

🐉 What Does It Look Like?

Descriptions vary, but most accounts agree on a few features:

• Long, serpentine or lizard-like body

• Very short body compared to a snake — sometimes described as stubby

• Two forelegs (sometimes four) with claws

• Cat-like or reptilian head

• Reported length: 1–2 meters (3–6 feet)

Some witnesses claimed it had:

• A wide mouth with sharp teeth

• Piercing eyes

• Smooth or scaly skin

It’s often described as aggressive and dangerous.

---

📜 Folklore & Reported Encounters

The Tatzelwurm appears in Alpine folklore dating back to at least the 18th century, though stories may be older. It was said to:

• Live in mountain caves or rocky crevices

• Attack livestock

• Poison or suffocate victims with breath or venom

There are scattered 19th and early 20th century reports from peasants and hikers claiming sightings in the Alps.

One famous alleged sighting occurred in 1828 near the Austrian Alps, where a man reportedly died after claiming to have encountered one. Later, in the early 1900s, some naturalists tried to investigate reports, but no physical evidence was ever found.

---

🧠 Possible Explanations

Scholars and skeptics have proposed several theories:

1. Misidentified animals

   • Large salamanders

   • Escaped exotic reptiles

   • Distorted sightings of martens or other Alpine mammals

2. Folkloric dragon survival

   • It may be a regional echo of European dragon legends.

3. Cultural fear-symbol

   • Mountain dangers personified: avalanches, crevasses, wild animals.

---

🐲 Is It a Cryptid?

Yes — in modern terms, the Tatzelwurm is classified as a cryptid (a creature reported in folklore but lacking scientific evidence), similar in category to:

• Loch Ness Monster

• Mokele-mbembe

However, unlike those, it is specifically rooted in Alpine mountain culture rather than lakes or jungles.

---

🔎 Cultural Meaning

In Alpine regions, the Tatzelwurm represents:

• Fear of wild, untamed nature

• The mystery of mountain caves

• A remnant of medieval dragon imagery localized into rural folklore

It’s less a “monster hunt” creature and more a regional mythic animal — somewhere between a dragon and a salamander.

---

If you’d like, I can also:

• Compare it to medieval dragon symbolism

• Explore its Jungian/archetypal meaning

• Look at how it relates to other Alpine spirit beings

• Or examine whether it could connect to older Indo-European serpent myths

Which direction interests you?

Could it be a misidentified large lizard (something like the Gila Monster in the United States)?

That’s a very reasonable hypothesis — and it’s one that has often been suggested.

Short answer: it’s unlikely, but not impossible in isolated cases.

Let’s break it down.

---

🦎 Comparison to the Gila monster

The Gila monster (found in the southwestern United States and northern Mexico) matches some Tatzelwurm descriptions:

Similarities

• Thick-bodied

• Large head

• Short, powerful legs with claws

• Venomous bite (which could explain “poison breath” folklore)

• Somewhat slow but intimidating appearance

Key problem:
Gila monsters are desert reptiles. They do not live in cold Alpine climates.

The Alps (in Austria, Switzerland, and Germany) are far too cold for such reptiles to survive naturally.

---

🌡 Climate Problem

Large lizards are ectothermic (cold-blooded). Alpine regions have:

• Long, cold winters

• Snow cover

• High elevations

• Short warm seasons

Even Europe’s largest native lizards (like wall lizards or green lizards) are much smaller and prefer warmer habitats.

A stable breeding population of something Gila-sized in the Alps would be biologically implausible without modern climate change — and even then, survival would be difficult.

---

🦎 What About Escaped Exotics?

This is more plausible in modern times:

• A privately kept exotic lizard escapes.

• Someone sees it.

• Local folklore interprets it through existing myth.

However:

• Most Tatzelwurm reports predate exotic pet trade.

• Many accounts describe creatures longer than any Gila monster (sometimes 1–2 meters).

---

🐉 More Likely Biological Candidates

If it was a real animal, possibilities might include:

1. Giant Salamanders (misidentification theory)

Europe does not have giant salamanders like Asia does, but large amphibians can look very strange when glimpsed briefly.

2. Distorted Mammal Sightings

A rearing marten, otter, or badger seen briefly in rocky terrain can look surprisingly serpentine.

3. Folkloric Amplification

A small lizard + fear + retelling = dragon-like creature over time.

---

🧠 Psychological & Folklore Layer

The “two-legged serpent” motif appears in medieval European dragon imagery. The Tatzelwurm may be:

• A regional survival of dragon iconography

• A mountain adaptation of the pan-European “wyrm”

The name itself (Wurm) already places it in that mythic category.

---

⚖️ So Could It Be a Gila-Monster-Type Animal?

Biologically stable Alpine population?
→ Extremely unlikely.

Occasional misidentified reptile?
→ Possible but weakly supported.

Myth emerging from distorted sightings + dragon folklore?
→ Much more probable.

---

If you're interested, we could go deeper into:

• Whether Europe ever had large lizards in historical times

• The evolutionary plausibility of a cold-adapted reptilian cryptid

• Or whether Alpine folklore preserves older Indo-European serpent myths

Which direction would you like to explore?

Whether Europe ever had large lizards in historical times.

Short answer: Yes — but not in the time period relevant to Tatzelwurm legends.

Europe has had very large reptiles in deep prehistory, but not in recorded human history in the Alpine region.

Let’s break it down carefully.

---

🦎 1. Deep Prehistory (Millions of Years Ago)

In the Miocene epoch (about 23–5 million years ago), Europe was warmer and supported large reptiles.

Giant Monitor Lizards

Fossils show that relatives of modern monitor lizards once lived in Europe. One famous example is:

• Varanus priscus (more commonly known from Australia, but related forms existed in Europe)

Europe had monitor-like lizards during warmer climatic periods, when subtropical ecosystems extended much farther north.

However:

• These disappeared long before humans.

• Climate cooling during the Ice Ages wiped out large reptile populations in Europe.

---

🦎 2. During the Ice Age (Pleistocene)

By the time humans were present in Europe (last 300,000 years):

• Large reptiles were already gone.

• Cold-adapted mammals dominated (mammoths, cave bears, etc.).

• Reptiles were limited to small, cold-tolerant species.

There is no fossil evidence of large lizards surviving in Ice Age Europe.

---

🦎 3. Historical / Medieval Europe

In recorded history:

• The largest European lizards are species like the green lizard (Lacerta viridis), typically under 40 cm.

• Europe has no native monitor lizards.

• No fossil or archaeological evidence suggests survival of large reptilian species into Roman or medieval times.

If something Gila-sized had existed in the Alps 1,000 years ago, we would expect:

• Bones in caves

• Mentions in Roman natural histories (e.g., Pliny)

• Physical remains

None exist.

---

🌍 4. Climate Barrier

The Alps (in Austria and Switzerland) have been cold for tens of thousands of years.

Large ectothermic reptiles:

• Cannot regulate internal temperature.

• Struggle in long freezing winters.

• Require warm basking environments and extended active seasons.

A hidden relic population surviving Ice Ages in Alpine caves would be biologically extraordinary — and would require a unique physiology unlike any known lizard.

---

🧬 5. Could a Cold-Adapted Large Reptile Evolve?

Theoretically?
Yes.

Realistically?
Extremely unlikely.

To survive Alpine winters, such a reptile would need:

• Extreme hibernation ability

• Deep geothermal cave habitats

• Very low metabolism

• A stable breeding population

No fossil record supports such a lineage.

---

🐉 Why the Legends Persist

Even though large lizards didn’t survive historically in Europe, Europe did preserve:

• Dragon myths

• Wyrm legends

• Serpent-killing hero stories

The word “Wurm” in Tatzelwurm already places it in that mythic lineage.

It’s much more plausible that:

• Small reptiles or mammals were misidentified.

• Dragon imagery survived in localized folklore.

• Mountain dangers became personified as a clawed serpent.

---

🔎 Bottom Line

Did Europe once have large lizards?
→ Yes — millions of years ago.

Did they survive into historical times in the Alps?
→ There is no fossil, archaeological, or textual evidence that they did.

Is the Tatzelwurm a survival of prehistoric reptile fauna?
→ Extremely unlikely.

---

If you'd like, we could explore something more speculative:

• Could Ice Age cave ecosystems hide unknown vertebrates?

• Or how dragon mythology may preserve distorted memory of prehistoric megafauna?

• Or whether similar “two-legged serpent” beings appear in Indo-European myth patterns?

Given your interest in comparative religion and symbolism, the mythic continuity angle might be especially interesting.

Hybrids like us

 

OK, the dog-fox hybrids are strange. Sure of that one? And why would conservationists "condemn" big cat hybrids? I mean, I assumed everyone loves ligers! Note also that polar bears are moving further south and hybridize with grizzlies as they go along. Are these hybrids fertile? If so, it seems the polar bear doesn´t need "saving", after all. Life will find a way. Finally, what´s up with those strange fish accidentally "created" by some crazy scientists in Hungary (I mean, where else)?   

10 of the strangest hybrid animals

Scientists accidentally create "impossible" hybrid fish

Fossils in our genes

 

Ghost lineage? 

Scientists believe they can "de-ghost" so-called ghost genes in the genomes of living animals and identify long lost species which left no fossils. For obvious reasons, ghost lineages of "superarchaic" humans are of special interest to the general public. But apparently, the same technique has also been used on frozen specimens of mammoths, yaks and lemmings. So if you are a superarchaic nerd with a longtime interest in lemming evolution, I suppose these are interesting times, LOL. 

What are ghost lineages?

Thriving before Armageddon

 

Here we go again. New evidence confirming that the (non-avian) dinosaurs weren´t in decline before the asteroid hit. Nupe, they were thriving and doing just fine, making that impact a genuine disaster. 

Dinosaurs were thriving before asteroid annihilated them all

Frat boy pseudo-science?

 

A Skeptic (and perhaps atheist) criticism of Jay Dyer, the bad boy of the Orthobro interwebs. "Frat boy brand of Christianity" is a keeper. 

TL/DR: Dyer is a young earth creationist and presuppositionalist. He actually references an essay by Traditionalist author Titus Burckhardt against evolution. (Our old friend Huston Smith had a similar argument about Platonic forms manifesting in the material world. Perhaps he got them from Burckhardt.) 

More unexpectedly, Dyer sounds agnostic on the existence of dinosaurs and even heliocentrism?! Which I suppose is inevitable if you interpret the Bible too literally. Not sure why Seraphim Rose´s name never comes up in the video. This content seems to be a kind of "parallel plot" to the recent drama between Dyer, Professor Dave et al.   

You are here

 

The god of this world?

Previously posted on July 29, 2025.  

So our kind of humans have been around for about 300,000 years, which is only 0.002% of the time the universe have existed so far (according to Big Bang cosmology) or 0.0066% of Earth´s existence. The average vertebrate genus exists for ten million years, which is about 0.22% of Earth's history (so far). Of course, the "high tech civilization" we all brag about is about 300 years old, and probably won´t last much longer.  

A 100-year human life is 0.0000022% of Earth’s current age and about 0.00000072% of the universe’s ditto. If the universe's age were one year (365 days) a 100-year human life would be about 0.004 seconds long. And most cornucopian professors don´t even live that long.

The planet we inhabit occupies about 0.000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000003% of the observable universe´s volume. We live in a "local hole" 150 million - 300 million light years wide, in which galaxies are relatively scarce. The observable universe is about 100 billion light years across. Humans have managed to reach the Moon and send space probes to the Kuyper belt, which is still in our cosmic backyard. 

On our planet, the most abundant multi-cellular organisms in terms of species might be beetles, and in terms of sheer numbers ants. The most common wild plants are weeds (from a human perspective). And yeah, I see ´em freakin´ everywhere! The oldest confirmed group of multicellular eukaryotes are red algae (1.2 billion years), while the oldest multicellular animals are sponges and cnidarians (600–700 million years) — and they still exist today. Of course, stromatolites were a thing already 3 billion years ago. The flamboyant dinosaurs have only been around for 5% of Earth´s history...and that includes the birds.

After a walk in the local parklands three years ago, I amused myself by checking up how old various genera of animals I spotted are in the geological record. Thus, gulls (genus Larus) has been around for 20 million years, crows (Corvus) for 5 million years, and so on. As already noted, our modern industrial civilization will probably not last more than 300 years. If I counted correctly, that´s 0.0015% of the time gulls of the genus Larus have existed on Earth.

No religious teacher can be taken seriously unless he/she factors in the above. Let him/her now step forward!

Indeterminate eukaryotes

 

HA HA HA, this is actually funny. So if aliens would have landed on Earth 400 million years ago, they would consider *our* world to be Planet Alien? 

Nobody even knows what "prototaxites" were, or even whether they were standing upright like large tree trunks or growing horizontally like fungal mats. Nor is it clear what they were: grandiose fungi, gargantuan lichens, bizarre hybrids, or an entirely new kingdom of life? They are definitely problematica! If they grew vertically, Earth´s landmasses looked very, very strange during the early Devonian, since plants were extremely small. 

There is even a speculation that arthropods quite literally *ate* all prototaxites, a lunch break that must have taken millions of years. I sense a new Walt Disney franchise coming up... 

Hopeful monsters

 

I´m still trying to process this as we speak. Our man Anton discusses LOME a.k.a. the Late Ordovician Mass Extinction. Which I´m sure you never heard about. Yet, your evolutionary grandmama might very well hail from this period of Earth history about 445 million years ago. The short story is that a series of radical changes in the Earth´s climate became too much for the dominant species at the time, which included jawless fishes known as conodonts and a number of peculiar squid-like molluscs. Jawed fishes did exist, but were few and specialized. Guess what happened next?

Thanks to LOME, jawed fish from isolated habitats in what is now southern China - where they had diversified in standard "hopeful monster" fashion - could start spreading throughout the oceans, filling the now empty ecological niches. Anton, ever the optimist, even refers to what happened as an "ecological reset". Something similar happened after the disappearence of non-avian dinosaurs, when mammals could freely radiate and take over. And here we are!

Not addressed in this happy video is the ecological reset after *we* are gone. Who knows, maybe jawless fish will again take over the oceans? That would be a fitting revenge after all these years!

Fact check: mostly true

 

Overheard on the interwebs: "Extinction event 450 million years ago is the reason we exist."

Yepp.  

Antecessors

 

- Why weren´t we mentioned in
your peer reviewed paper, huh?

Some recent revisions of our bushy family tree. However, the main lines of evolution are still clear. So our direct ancestor wasn´t Lucy, but some *other* ape-woman? Go figure. But sure, the skeletal remains at Dmanisi need to be sorted out, I think!

Last common ancestor of modern humans and Neanderthals possibly found

Homo erectus not the first human to leave Africa

"Lucy" was not our direct ancestor

So isolationism works?

 

Does this mean that "isolationism" works, after all?

Indigenous lineage persisted for 8,500 years 

Ancient humans in southern Africa were isolated for 100,000 years

Ancient humans stayed around rock shelter for 9,000 years

Upright and sapient?

 

OK, this was an interesting discovery. The world´s oldest "art" might come from...wait for it...Homo erectus! Sensu stricto, to boot. The carved shells were discovered already during the 1890´s by none other than Eugène Dubois himself. Since they are 540,000 years old, this obviously raises a lot of questions. Or maybe not, since we already knew that the erecti could make stone tools. So why not art, bruh?  

540,000-Year-Old Shell Carvings May Be Human Ancestor´s Oldest Art

Clarification

 

"Ganas? Naah, I´m a gana. That guy is some kind of Paranthropus!"