Thursday, August 30, 2018

The Next Generation

I even posted toy reviews on Amazon, like this one... 

I'm more cool than the other customer reviewers. I'm old enough to have played with the original "First Generation" Playmobil figures, the ones with the non-adjustable legs. Yeah, really! A friend of mine (same age) even had the super-cool, super-collectible Hungarian fake Playmobils, the ones with the bad leg parts. The Hungarian copies were apparently banned after the fall of gulasch socialism, not being properly licensed by the Brandstätter Group. And no, I won't sell them to you, even if I could found them after all these years. OK, maybe in a peak oil crisis situation, yes?

As a kid, all my Playmobil toys were part of the nation of "Playmobilia", ruled autocratically by that blue king of the First Generation. Remember him? I believed Playmobilia later ended up becoming liberal or democratic socialist. A reactionary separatist movement spearheaded by the Majo-Kit minifigures (not sold by Amazon) was suppressed. I'm not sure what happened to the king-dictator, although I suppose he fled to a neighbouring fascist superpower led by a plastic toy vampire! OK, don't tell me, I was disturbed already as a child. But as I said, I have the original figurines, and you, dear Sir, do not.

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