Jefferson´s Gnostic Bible

I recently searched Amazon for “occult” books about or by former U.S. presidents. Some interesting stuff did emerge, such as the Masonic correspondence of George Washington (probably genuine) or the supposed Spiritualist séances held in the White House by Abraham Lincoln (probably fake, but who knows). There's also some channeled material claiming that Obama is a benign alien (that is, space alien – not from Krypton, though) and books mentioning Reagan's very real interest in astrology.

And then there's this: “The Book of the Holy Grail” by Joseph of Arimathea, supposedly translated by Thomas Jefferson, who alongside his office as Big White Chief (pun intended) moonlighted as Grand Master of the Strict Observance – Knights Templar, the United Orders of the American Rite. Or so the editor of this volume, one J R Ploughman, wants us to believe.

Do we believe it? Of course not. This is simply Ploughman's own eclectic stew of privately held spirituality, dressed up in more ancient garb to hoodwink the unwary. The book was published in 1999, and I challenge anyone to come up with a 19th or 18th century edition!

Ploughman's version of “Gnostic” or “Merovingian” Christianity turns out to be a bizarre combination of Mormonism, Masonry, the OTO (I think – I tend to avoid that particular milieu) and the Merovingian Bloodline speculations of Michael Baigent and Richard Leigh (who also inspired Dan Brown's bestselling “The Da Vinci Code”). The Serpent Seed hypothesis lurks in the background (as behooves serpents). Both Joseph Smith and James Jesse Strang are said to have been true Gnostics. The main adversaries of humanity are Lucifer, Lilith the hairy night fiend, and the three headed Hecate who bellows fire and smoke. Joseph of Arimathea is said to have been the father of Jesus, who was never crucified and later left for France, where he married Mary Magdalene. Simon of Cyrene was crucified instead. Reincarnation is taught, the United States is the “Third Chosen Land” and American English the “Chosen Language”.

Although it's never spelled out explicitly, I think it's obvious that the central ritual of this pseudo-religion is a sexual union between the priest and the priestess, reminiscent of Wicca, OTO or the Church of Satan. Feminism and “political correctness” is explicitly rejected. Homosexuality is frowned upon. Paedophilia and sex between children, however, is taught. Apparently, children should have sex in front of adults! Since marriage outside the “bloodline” is prohibited, we are dealing with a receipt for creating a sex cult.

Of course, there's always a chance that “The Book of the Holy Grail” is a joke. Ploughman freely admits that he's a Discordian. Discordianism is often regarded as a parody religion. The book does have traits suggesting parody, including claims to be derived from “the mystery schools of Albania” and constant misspellings. The attempt to claim Jefferson is presumably in keeping with Ploughman's “libertarianism”. Of course, another possibility is that Ploughman is a libertine rather than libertarian, and that the jocular mode of his teachings is a way to hide the fact that he truly does believe in “free love”. Compare the Church of Satan's so-called bible, also poised in the grey zone between parody and sheer nastiness.

After all, humor may be a way to hide an unpalatable message. Perhaps that's the real esoteric secret of “The Book of the Holy Grail”…

One thing is for sure. This would never have been allowed in the Old Dominion!