A clarification

It recently came to my attention that the vile and nefarious impostor who claims to be "Ashtar Command" has pulled off another one of his stunts, claiming that I hate Shetland Sheepdogs, a.k.a. Shelties.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

Shelties are highly evolved extraterrestrial beings, hailing from the ascended star Lakuma in the Sirius system. There, the Shelties dwelleth in perpetual light and love, together with New World Blackbirds and Bald-Headed Eagles. They are tenderly overseen by Lassie himself.

On December 21, 2012 the evil Annunaki aliens of Nibiru wanted to burn your planet like cinder, but due to the intercession of said Shelties, the Interplanetary Masters of Lakuma took firm and decisive action, sending Nibiru all the way to the dogs. Of course, this was done on the express condition (communicated telepathically to all denizens of Earth via Youtube) that Shelties should be given only high quality food and the best distilled water to drink. Also, you must give them qualified exercise and really nice toys.

If not, another attack by the Annunaki might elicit a somewhat more passive response from our side, although all Shelties will (of course) be beamed away to safety before the final countdown.

Apparently, one of said Annunaki has disguised himself as "Ashtar Command", distorting the true intentions of the Light Bearers. Do not be deceived! The future of your godforsaken little planet, including the Shetland Islands, might depend on it.

Real Ashtar Command, over and out.