Sunday, September 16, 2018

The men who stare at Trump

A review of "Remote Viewing the Donald Trump Administration: Troubled Times Ahead" 

It's not clear whether this short e-book, really an article, is a hoax, some kind of parody, or a product of honestly confused minds. Perhaps it's a combination of all three? Apparently, the Annapolis Remote Viewing Group previously predicted a Hillary Clinton presidency, since one of their members “saw” a person with blonde hair and blue pants in the White House. On further reflection (and, I suppose, more remote viewing), the Annapolis group has decided that this mysterious personage was really Donald Trump!

However, it seems that our brave astral travelers weren't *entirely* right, since they predict that Marco Rubio (of all people) will become Trump's vice-president. Mike Pence isn't even mentioned. Now, Rubio and Pence can hardly be confused, so I say we have a little credibility problem here! The men who stare at goats (or future presidents) also predict lethal violence from the police against anti-Trump protesters, and claim that these protests are really “false flags” instigated by the Trump campaign. This haven't happened either, and the false flags seem to be all Democrat! Another failed prediction is the claim that Bernie Sanders won't support Clinton and may even stand as a third party candidate. It's also highly unlikely at this stage that the Libertarian Party will carry New Mexico. Perhaps the astral traveler who saw this had smoked a joint before commencing the process...?

The ARVG then make a series of very concrete predictions about events during the Trump presidency: a militia uprising in North Dakota, Russia occupying territory in the Baltic, China seizing American-owned iPhone plants before they can move back to the United States, and chicken liver becoming unavailable in the U.S. due to international trade wars. Trump resigns in 2018 or 2019 after some kind of heart attack and leaves power to Little Marco. Wars with Iran and Israel (sic) loom, but nothing is said about North Korea, the Philippines or ISIS?! Nor is it clear what Rubio will do about the chicken livers.

I'm pretty sure none of this will happen the way our fellow occultists describe it (OK, I haven't done a market analysis on the logistics of chicken liver imports under conditions of economic down-turn), but at the same time, most of the events mentioned aren't intrinsically impossible, the sole exception being the war with Israel. I must therefore say that the Annapolis Remote Viewing Group (which apparently isn't even based in Annapolis, but then, we are talking about *remote* viewing) are playing it safe compared to most other prophets, who are foreseeing everything from huge collisions with Planet X to the spectacular appearance of the Anti-Christ. Strangely, all of them missed to predict Donald Trump!

Too realistic for a religious tract, too boring for a parody and too much of a straight and clean-shaven face for a hoax, this pamphlet in my opinion only deserves two stars!
Did you see *that* coming, huh?

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