The Bigfoot Bird

Pssst...don't say anything, keep your voices down, BUT I THINK THAT'S AN IVORY-BILLED WOODPECKER!!! Whatever you do, don't tell Audubon. Knowing that awful man, he'll probably blast the poor bird from the trees with a 19th century flint-lock gun or something, just to be able to paint it later?! Time for somebody to change the "collective representation" around here, it seems. I mean, can you imagine what the man would do if an Archaeopteryx would appear in his backyard apple trees..? Well, I can (clue: he's got a 18th century hunting rifle, too) so....pssst....keep your voices down...